How I feel

So I've been thinking alot lately about how I feel about myself. And to tell you the truth I'm not happy with the way I look. It's hard after having a baby and getting back to your weight before, I love having my daughter but I don't love the new me. I'm working on getting back to what I weighed when I got pregnant. And I know that alot of people say you will never look the same as you did before you had a child but Im not asking to look like I did before my baby, just what I weighed before her. I have alot of work to do.
Ive never been the type to really care what I looked like because I always felt good about myself. Ive never fit in a size 6 because that would of been nasty a girl who is 5'11" in a size 6 thats way skinny. I looked good in my clothes no muffin tops and I fit in everything I have, I always had something to wear because the stuff fit. I look back now at my pictures before my daughter and see how flat my tummy was, how small my legs and arms were. And I really never knew that I looked like that. That I was skinny, not to skinny and held myself well. I always thought differant. I now look at myself, in the mirror or a picture and I go " eww", I cant believe thats me, its sad. I cant fit in any of my clothes, I hate getting dressed. I look at other women and wish I could look like them, I have never done this, ever! No body knows how much I way and I know that people cant believe I way 225...because Im tall and it doesnt show. I was 170 when I got pregnant. And now Im over 200 pounds. Thats sick! In my eyes anyway. Im tired of looking and feeling fat, or over weight, So Im ganna do something about it. Im laying of the junk food and cutting down on the Dr Pepper ( i could say thats what my butt it made of ). Im ganna start working out 2-3 times a week to start, no matter how tired I am. And Im going to loose 50 POUNDS, by the summer time. Look and feel great. Ill keep everyone updated. Ive also posted a picture of me before I had my daughter and after. So you all can see the transfer... Wish me luck